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  • Top Ten Things Not to Do If Your Book Gets a Negative Review

    March 10th, 2014

    Here is the 36th installment of Ten Top Lists of What Not to Do by Marie Ann Bailey of 1WriteWay at http://1writeway.com and John W. Howell of Fiction Favorites at http://johnwhowell.com. These lists are simu-published on our blogs each Monday. We hope you enjoy.
    Rate this book!
    10.  If your book gets a negative review, do not read the review, especially if the rating is one star.  At best, the reviewer will admit the review is based on having read only a couple of pages of your book and you can chide yourself for even bothering to read one word of the review.  At worst, you will read the review so many times  you can quote it by heart, begin to believe it, and eventually get one star tattooed on your back to atone for imagined errors in your career choice.

    9.  If your book gets a negative review, do not respond to the review in any way.  If you do, at best, the reviewer will ignore your comments and let others decide if you just have a case of sour grapes.  At worst, the reviewer will take great delight in responding to your comments, goading you into an outraged frenzy whereupon the website will block you from seeing any more reviews.

    8.  If your book gets a negative review, do not search for and then comment on other books that the reviewer has reviewed.   Even if you have read those books, at best, you will be taking precious time away from your writing just to get even with the reviewer.  At worst, the reviewer will realize it is you and seek a court injunction on the grounds that you are unstable as evidenced by you spending so much more time reviewing other books rather than writing one.

    7.  If your book gets a negative review, do not ask your family or friends to target the reviewer with their own commentaries.  If you do, at best, the reviewer will just ignore them and eventually they will lose interest.  At worst, they will all end up in an unsightly battle of words and then they will all get banned from the website and your family and friends will turn on you like a wounded Leopard.

    6.  If your book gets a negative review, do not assume a false identity and write reviews of your book to counter the negative review.  If you do, at best, no one will know it’s you and eventually you will just feel as if you are a loser. (You think?). At worst, someone will uncover your identity and both you and your book will be pulled from the websites, leaving your readers to think you’ve been arrested or kidnapped..

    5.  If your book gets a negative review, do not start a campaign against negative reviews, using the negative review as an example.  At best, the campaign will quickly fizzle out as so many do without the reviewer ever knowing about it.  At worst, the reviewer will see your campaign and accuse you of libel, slapping you with a lawsuit so expensive  you will be doomed to write PR copy for the Russians full time for the rest of your life in order to pay it off.

    4.  If your book gets a negative review, do not think that you should suddenly switch genres just because one reviewer doesn’t “get” your book.  If you do, at best, you might discover writing erotica causes you to take too many breaks during the day so you can try out scenes with your significant other and so your productivity suffers.  At worst, you might discover that while you may now enjoy writing erotica, you can’t get your children’s literature agent or any publisher’s interest in your new book.

    3.  If your book gets a negative review, do not take the reviewer’s advice to quit writing and take up dishwashing as an occupation.  At best, the long hours at the sink will only cause your imagination to go into high gear and you’ll be back to writing within a few days.  At worst, your brain will turn to mush from the boring drudgery and by the time you can retire from said occupation, you will have forgotten how you got stuck as a dishwasher in the first place.

    2.  If your book gets a negative review, do not think one bad review trumps all your positive reviews.  If you do, at best, your faithful readers will not mind you’ve suddenly changed narrative styles because you are talented in any style you choose.  At worst, you will find yourself writing only for the one reviewer who really doesn’t care about you or your books anyway, and your readers will have to organize an intervention to keep you from reading any more negative reviews.

    1.  If your book gets a negative review, do not stop writing.  If you do, at best, you will suddenly have more time on your hands than you know what to do with.  At worst, you will disappoint your readers and they will accuse you of emulating J.D. Salinger, which of course you cannot afford to do until you actually become J.D. Salinger.

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  • Throw away the rules that bind.

    March 7th, 2014

    Looking for a place for your poetry, stories, essays, photography to be published both online and on paper? Jayde-Ashe of The Paperbook Collective has loosened up her guidelines a bit (much like me loosening up the waistline on my clothes … so much more comfortable :)). One highlight is she will now take submissions of work that has already been published, say on your blog or another website. This is great news for those of us who have published poems or stories on our blog and then been told that those works of art are not acceptable for submissions to other venues. So go to The Paperbook Collective, check out the revised guidelines and SUBMIT :)

    Jayde-Ashe's avatarThe Paperbook Blog

    It’s Friday afternoon, and I am elbow deep in Issue Eight of The Paperbook Collective. I should probably be nose deep in a glass of wine, but there is none in the house. That I can find anyway…

    So I’m feeling a bit crazy, a little bit wild, slightly Mad Hatter-esque. And a thought just struck me.

    Let’s throw out the rule book for good.

    I had grand intentions when I first begun The Paperbook Collective. I thought it would be released promptly on the 1st of each month, it would include specific types of content, submissions would end on a specific date and it would all be very professional and proper.

    But let’s be honest. Professional and proper? That’s not really my style.

    So here are the ‘guidelines’ I created at the start of this journey:

    Guidelines:

    1. All work must be original and unpublished. This means it cannot…

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  • Time running out on the Yesterday Road discount

    March 6th, 2014

    Kevin Brennan’s novel Yesterday Road is still available for $2 at Smashwords but only through Saturday night, so hurry up and get a copy! Check out the ratings and reviews of Yesterday Road on Amazon if you must. I’ve read it and gave it 5 stars :) Brennan’s collection of short shorts, Our Children Are Not Our Children, is FREE at Smashwords through Saturday as well. Do yourself a favor. Get BOTH, because after you read Our Children, you will want to read more by Kevin Brennan. And, by the way, I rated Our Children 5 stars as well :) So stop reading my post and get your(self) over to Smashwords!

    Kevin Brennan's avatarWHAT THE HELL

    Small cover
    Just a reminder, folks, that Yesterday Road is on sale at Smashwords through Saturday night for $2. You can buy it here . Believe it or not, not one soul has taken advantage of this offer yet, and only one has downloaded Our Children Are Not Our Children for flippin’ free!

    Sure, this has no effect on my Amazon ranking (which is slipping fast), but I want you to have the book. I really do. And I want you to have it for two bucks. And, when you’re finished reading it, I want you to be able to tell all your friends that it’s worth at least twice that much!

    Spread the word.

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  • Support My Favorite Dilettante!

    March 4th, 2014

    On behalf of a dear friend, wonderful writer, and favorite dilettante, I ask that you drop whatever your doing (well, if you’re reading this on a laptop, you don’t want to literally drop it), and hop over to Helena Hann-Basquiat’s blog, in particular this post: A Very Unwelcome Swamp.  Helena’s friend and Kickstarter promoter has had the rather disgusting experience of a sewer line backing up into his basement.  I know, go ahead and say, “GROSS!”  Now that that’s out of your system, after you read Helena’s post, go over to Helena’s Kickstarter project at https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/jimsquires/memoirs-of-a-dilletante-volume-one and either contribute yourself (you can participate for as little as $1) and promote the bloody hell out of it.

    If you’re not familiar with Helena’s writing (and I don’t know how on earth that could be possible), spend some time on her blog.  Her stories at once make you laugh and tug at your heart.  If you prefer stories that are more along the lines of H.P. Lovecraft, then spend some time with Helena’s pet Jessica B. Bell.  In fact, Jessica has a number of short stories you can purchase at Amazon (click here).

    So there are a number of ways you can show support for Helena and for Jim as well.  After all, it takes a village … even a virtual one :)

    Related articles
    • Author Interview & Book Debut: Helena Hann-Basquiat
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  • Top Ten Things Not to Do When Spending Time in the DMV

    March 3rd, 2014

    Here is the 35th installment of Ten Top Lists of What Not to Do by Marie Ann Bailey of 1WriteWay at http://1writeway.com and John W. Howell of Fiction Favorites at http://johnwhowell.com. These lists are simu-published on our blogs each Monday. We hope you enjoy.

    DMV

    10.  When spending time in the DMV, do not show any sign of impatience. If you do, at best, the clerks will slow service just to see you sweat. At worst, you will need a defillibrator to restart your heart after you go apoplectic from missing your turn because you forgot to take a number.

    9.  When spending time in the DMV, make sure all your paperwork is complete before your number is called. If you don’t, at best, the clerks will have a good laugh sending you back to the end of the queue. At worst, you will be tempted to say something like “Really?” in a heavily sarcastic voice which will result in you being banned from the DMV for the day.

    8.  When spending time in the DMV, make certain you do not leave the room until your number is called. If you do, at best, your number will be called the second you leave and you’ll rush back in time. At worst, your number will be called and the next person served and you will need to wait until your number comes up again in a week.

    7.  When spending time in the DMV, be careful on what and how much you drink. If you don’t, at best, you will experience number eight while visiting the restroom. At worst, you will try to gut it out and the clerks will be able to tell you are in a dire situation and prolong your agony according to number ten.

    6.  When spending time in the DMV, do not arrive during the hours of eleven and two. If you do, at best, you will be subject to the lunch hour slowdown and have a longer wait. At worst, you will be caught in a never-ending situation with only one clerk at a time working while the rest go out for drinks and to celebrate the hundredth slow down heart attack of the month.

    5.  When spending time in the DMV, make sure you bring something to read other than your phone, kindle or tablet. If you don’t, at best, you will be forced to ask your neighbor for something to read since the DMV is a digital dead zone. At worst, you will be forced to watch the slowly moving clerks for hours on end who appear to be sharing the same “look at this” joke and working two and three together on one problem.

    4.  When spending time in the DMV, do not make eye contact with any humans in the room. If you do, at best, you will be asked to help with someone’s paperwork. At worst, you’ll have to hear some sad story of why this person needs to get back to work to support the sick family and a request to trade places which you will find hard to turn down.

    3. When spending time in the DMV, do not talk to any human beings in the room. If you do, at best, you will need to endure the endless complaining on the slowness of the system. At worst, you may find yourself in the company of someone who is getting ready to crack under the DMV waiting pressure.

    2.  When spending time in the DMV, do not dress in your finest. If you do, at best, you will be subject to endless requests for “just a dollar so I can get my license.” At worst, you might be asked to hand over all your money by a serious looking gent who swears he has a gun in his pants.

    1.  When spending time in the DMV, do not attempt to numb your pain with any kind of substance, controlled or otherwise. If you do, at best, you might fall asleep and miss the call of your number. At worst, you might end up on the six and eleven o’clock news leading a riot in the DMV which seemed like a good idea at the time you were leading it.

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  • Author Interview: Andra Watkins

    March 2nd, 2014

    Welcome to an interview with Andra Watkins, author of the forthcoming To Live Forever: An Afterlife Journey of Meriwether Lewis from Word Hermit Press.  To Live Forever debuted on March 1, 2014, the same date that Andra commenced to walk the entire length of the road where Lewis died, the Natchez Trace, all 444 miles of it.

    alw-headshot-blog

    Andra also has a very popular blog at The Accidental Cootchie Mama, where she writes about writing, traveling, her dad, MTM (her husband), boiled peanuts, and anything else that comes to mind.

    Andra “sat down” with me for this interview some days before the full launch for To Live Forever.

    M:  Andra, thank you so much for agreeing to this interview and for walking all the way from Charleston, South Carolina.  That’s almost 400 miles.  Your dogs must be hot and tired.  Here, I made you a warm bath that you can soak them in while we talk.  Please sit here and make yourself comfortable.

    AW: Aaaaahhh. Incredible. My feet are perking up already.

    M:  Can I get you something to drink?  Here’s a bowl of boiled peanuts we can share.  I got them from a roadside stand about a mile from here.  And don’t mind the cats.  They just like to sleep on the back of the couch.

    AW: Gin and tonic goes best with boiled peanuts. I won’t ask for a Thunderclapper. I had to sample too many versions to get it just right for my novel. I think I still have brain damage…..

    M:  Yes, I saw the recipe on your blog (smile).  You know, I’ve been wanting to interview you for quite some time.  I’m fascinated by the novel that you’ve written, To Live Forever:  An Afterlife Journey of Meriwether Lewis.   Now, on your blog, you describe it as thus:  “It’s a mishmash of historical fiction, paranormal fiction and suspense that follows Meriwether Lewis (of Lewis & Clark fame) after his mysterious death on the Natchez Trace in 1809.”  What possessed you to write an afterlife of Lewis?

    AW: What if you lived an amazing life, but a few bad decisions at the end tainted how you are remembered? Maybe your story was so much bigger than people would ever be taught, but because the winners write history, few people outside the circle of history geeks will ever really understand all you accomplished or contributed. If you were given the chance to erase the end, to ensure that people remembered you the way you wished to be, would you take it? I gambled that Lewis would take that chance. He doesn’t know how he’s remembered, but he’s terrified that his actions at the end will relegate him to a historical footnote. He’s willing to risk total obscurity to change that.

    M:  And as part of the debut of your novel, you plan to walk the 444 miles of Natchez Trace, where Lewis died.  What (in heaven’s name) has inspired you to walk the Trace?  What kind of training are you doing for this walk?

    AW: My dad is almost 80 years old. I wanted to give him an adventure to look forward to in the twilight of his life. When I pitched this to him, he was hooked. Because my novel is in part about a little girl who’s looking for her father, having Dad along made sense. To train, I’m walking. A lot.

    M:  How are your feet doing right now?  Is the water still warm enough?  There’s a fluffy towel next to you if you want to dry them off.  Now, Andra, you have two stories published, that I know of:  “A Man With a Satisfied Mind” which was published in Precipice Volume II, a literary anthology, and “Bad Deal” which was published in another anthology, Echoes in Darkness. [includes links to books]  First, do you have any other publications?  And, second, could you talk about these two stories, how they came about, and how they got published in anthologies?

    AW: Not currently. “A Man With a Satisfied Mind” came from my imagining what it would be like to be trapped in Mammoth Cave after a visit there. “Bad Deal” is an excerpt from my novel. Both came about through connections I made by blogging. Cameron Garriepy is an awesome writer, and she invited me to participate in Echoes. I submitted the other story to Precipice, and the Write On Edge people selected it.

    M:  When you’re not training and writing and traveling, what else do you do?  I’ll admit, I was happy to see on your blog that you like yoga, but that you don’t stand on your head.  I’ve been practicing for several years and only once I did a headstand, but with help (my instructor held onto my legs).  If you can picture me upside-down, practically yelling “Let me down!  Let me down!”  I was going quickly into panic mode.  That was my first and last headstand.  Shoulder-stand is about as inverted as I’ll allow myself now.

    AW: Isn’t shoulder-stand the best? I like to eat, and I still enjoy hanging out with my husband. I’m really involved in Rotary International, and I’m proud of the work they do in the world.

    M:  What is a typical writing day for you?  Do you set yourself goals like word or page counts?  What needs to happen for you to say that you’ve had a productive and satisfying writing day?

    AW: When I’m working on a book, I write in the afternoon and evening. I usually go for a walk late morning. If I write anything, I consider it productive.

    M:  Now, many of the authors I’ve interviewed and reviewed are self-published.  Your novel will be published by Word Hermit Press.  How did you come about to choose Word Hermit Press?  What is it like to work with them?

    AW: Word Hermit Press chose me. It’s been an amazing experience so far.

    M:  That’s wonderful!  Do you have any advice for writers who aspire to be published authors?

    AW: Be true to yourself and your goals for your writing. Don’t be afraid to invest in yourself, to believe in yourself, to trust yourself.

    M:  Finally, Andra, your blog.  It is hugely popular.  On any given day, you can have 30-50 comments, and you post frequently, almost every day.  How do you keep up with your blog and your followers?  Besides the fact that your blog is very entertaining, many of your posts are humorous and include photos, what else might you attribute the success of your blog?

    AW: My readers are a priority for me. They matter. I care about them. People care what they have to say more than they care about what I have to say. I have always operated my blog with that attitude. I hope my readers know how much I appreciate them.

    M: Andra, it’s truly been my pleasure to talk with you today.  Thank you again for taking the time for this interview, and for traveling all this way by foot.  Although, now I think you’re ready for a new pair of shoes.

    AW: I was honored to walk all this way. Thanks for having me.

    ***

    Thanks to everyone for reading my interview with author, Andra Watkins.  Be sure to follow her blog at http://andrawatkins.com/ and pick up a copy of To Live Forever:  An Afterlife Journey of Meriwether Lewis as soon as it’s available.  In the meantime, check her other stories, both available as ebooks or paperbacks from Amazon, Echoes in Darkness and  Precipice:  The Literary Anthology of Write on Edge, Volume II

    You can also follow Andra at: Twitter, Google+, and Facebook

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  • A day in the life – when you are trapped in your body

    March 1st, 2014

    Nothing I can say will ever match what Belinda says in this post on http://www.busymindthinking.com. So just read.

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  • A Phenomenal Book Promotion by a Phenomenal Person

    March 1st, 2014

    Dear Readers, you will want to hustle over to Andra Watkins blog (click here) and begin to partake in all the social media and activities that she has organized to promote her new book, To Live Forever: An Afterlife Journey of Meriwether Lewis.

    Click on the title to see all the ways you can purchase this novel.  And be sure to sign up for any number of social media where Andra will keep you informed (and entertained) as she makes her way, by foot, along the 444-mile Natchez Trace.

    Related articles
    • To Live Forever: An Afterlife Journey of Meriwether Lewis: A Dilettante’s Review
    • Support My Aching Feet: Enter the To Live Forever Contest.
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  • From Interesting Literature: Five Fascinating Facts about John Steinbeck

    February 27th, 2014

    Click Five Fascinating Facts about John Steinbeck to read some fascinating facts about John Steinbeck.  Number 5 should be of special interest to my friend Jayde Ashe-Thomas of The Paperbook Collective.  She is a fan of author Thom Steinbeck, John Steinbeck’s son (read one of her posts here) and, of course, John Steinbeck himself (he’s her “homeboy“)   :)

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  • Five Fascinating Facts about Henry James

    February 26th, 2014

    I wonder how many of those who may read my blog will be familiar with, much less a reader of, Henry James, a writer who is perhaps the most opposite to Ernest Hemingway, in his style of writing, that is, if not just his time and nature. In short, I have a lovely Modern Library edition of The Ambassadors that I’ve never been able to complete reading because I start dozing after only a couple of pages, and I wonder if any of this blog’s followers have had that experience with James or not, but if you are interested at all in Henry James then you must, indeed, click through and read these fascinating facts about him.

    InterestingLiterature's avatarInteresting Literature

    By Viola van de Sandt

    1. He had no regrets. In a letter to fellow novelist Hugh Walpole, James wrote in 1913: ‘We must know, as much as possible, in our beautiful art . . . what we are talking about – &  the only way to know it is to have lived & loved & cursed & floundered & enjoyed & suffered – I don’t think I regret a single “excess” of my responsive youth – I only regret, in my chilled age, certain occasions & possibilities I didn’t embrace.’

    Henry James2. James’s close and long-standing friendship with Constance Fenimore Woolson, a widely-read writer who like James had also settled in Europe, ended abruptly when Woolson jumped from her bedroom window in Venice in 1894. It fell to James to sort through her belongings and finally dispose of her clothing. Unable to sell or burn her dresses, he eventually…

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