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  • Guest Kilted Author Seumas Gallacher

    October 8th, 2013

    A truly entertaining guest post by Seumas Gallacher on Chris The Story Reading Ape!

    Chris The Story Reading Ape's avatarChris The Story Reading Ape's Blog

    kilt 2

    …from neophyte computer Jurassic to Trumpeter Extraordinaire for the SOSYAL NETWURKIN WURLD… what a helluva trip!…

    …the mail message looked innocent enuff… the Story Reading Ape’s missive simply asked for a Guest Blog piece to tell people about myself… easy, right?… not so fast, Sherlock… remember the immortal lines from my slightly more famous countryman, the poet, Robert Burns… ‘…O wad some Pow’r the giftie gie us, To see oursels as ithers see us…’ …and therein lies the quandary… Auld Rabbie’s WURDS were from his poem,‘To A Louse’ …p’raps some aptness in that… whatever the rest of the planet may think of me and my WURKS, here’s how it’s been of late…

    … some 60+ years ago, my Ma birthed me in the same street in Dockside Govan in Glasgow as Sir Alex Ferguson, he of Manchester United fame… he’s older than me by 6 years, has tons…

    View original post 389 more words

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  • From Anne R. Allen’s blog: How to Stay Safe in the Internet Jungle

    October 8th, 2013

    One of the most informative (and frightening) posts I’ve read on trying to stay safe in the “wild frontier” that is (still) the Internet.  Click here to read Anne R. Allen’s post, “The Laws of the (Amazon) Jungle—Eight Rules Authors Need to Know to Stay Safe.”  Be sure to take notes.

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  • Cinematic Pet Peeves

    October 7th, 2013

    A very funny post on movie pet peeves. Apparently a theme for this Monday ;)

    Charles Yallowitz's avatarLegends of Windemere

    My friend, John W. Howell, is a funny man and made a post today about what not to do when on a movie date.  I got to thinking about my movie pet peeves.  So, upon request, I’m going to make a silly list:

    1. The cellphone!  I can handle vibration mode because for all I know the person is really, really lonely.  Who am I to judge?  Just turn the brightness down, buddy.  It’s a strange annoyance, but noticing a glowing fucking light to the side while watching the movie is distracting.  Besides, if you’re going to play Angry Birds instead of watch the movie, have some fucking skill in it.
    2. Kicking of my seat.  Funny thing is that I can take it from kids as long as the parent tries to stop them.  Not parental move then I get annoyed and will glance back with a ‘I will dump…

    View original post 413 more words

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  • Top Ten Things Not To Do When At the Movies on a Date

    October 7th, 2013

    Here is the Fourteenth installment of Ten Top Lists of What Not to Do by Marie Ann Bailey of 1WriteWay at http://1writeway.com and John W. Howell of Fiction Favorites at http://johnwhowell.com. These lists are simu-published on our blogs each Monday. We hope you enjoy.
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    10.  When at the movies on a date, refrain from buying the biggest popcorn and soda even if you are really hungry.  Your date will probably prefer to hear your stomach grumble than hear you belch and burp through the sex scenes that rival Last Tango in Paris.

    9.  When at the movies on a date, do not use your smartphone to play a quick game of Tetris while the theatre runs advertisements for coke and candy. Unless your date is also ignoring you, ignoring your date while you achieve the next level might find you leaving the theater alone.

    8.  When at the movies on a date, refrain from giggling during any explicit sex scenes in the movie.  At best your date might just think you’re prudish and shy about sex.  At worst, your date might think the giggling stems from an intention to replicate the scenes at your place later.

    7.  When at the movies on a date, refrain from giggling during bloody violent scenes in the movies.  At best your date might think you’re a bit juvenile.  At worst, your date might think the giggling stems from an intention to replicate the scenes back at your place.

    6.  When at the movies on a date, do not talk loudly to your date during the movie.  You might wind up being given a shower of sticky buttery popcorn and flat coca-cola by the movie-goers around you or worse a flashlight in the face and request to leave by a big usher named Tiny.

    5.  When at the movies on a date, do not merely put your smartphone on silent mode but turn it off completely.  The buzzing from your phone’s vibration mode will likely cause your date to wonder about who’s calling and other people in the theater to continually check their own phones.  Once the audience realizes the buzzing phone is yours, you may be on the hook for everyone’s refund since you caused them to miss most of the movie. The worst part is you will never be able to explain who was doing all the calling.

    4.  When at the movies on a date, refrain from sitting in dead center of the theater if you know that you will need to exit frequently to use the restroom after downing that thirty-two ounce Big Gulp.  Your date will likely not appreciate having your butt block the view of the screen each time you leave, but others in the theater audience may take such exception as to purposely trip you as you try to step over their feet leading to an unexpected arrival of the Big Gulp.

    3.  When at the movies on a date, do not start reciting the movie dialogue just because you’ve seen it several times already.  Unless you and your date are watching The Rocky Horror Picture Show, you will likely wind up with your date moving to another row far away or worse, the belief that you have had a number dates at the same movie.

    2.  When at the movies on a date, avoid choosing a film that has a good likelihood of causing you to become sick to your stomach, such as The Blairwitch Project or the iMax version of Martin Scorsese’s Shine a Light.  At best, you will simply feel like throwing up during the whole movie.  At worst, you may actually find yourself throwing up on the row in front of you, which will probably ruin any chances of another date and a demand to pay the cleaning tabs.

    1.  When at the movies on a date, do not assume that because other people are present, this would be a safe place in which to break up with your date.  At best, the show that your date will put on might be more entertaining than the film itself.  At worst, you may wind up with both a shower of popcorn, Milk Duds and soda and a court date for disturbing the peace.

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  • Bitterroot Release!!!

    October 5th, 2013

    Now available on Amazon: Bitterroot, the sequel to Pipe Dreams, by Destiny Allison!

    destinyallison's avatarDestiny Allison

    Bitterroot_new_subtitleI’m so psyched to announce that Bitterroot has been released and is now available on Amazon! It will be available on all platforms by the end of the month (just a little crazy busy right now). I hope you check it out and take the time to leave a review.

    Here’s the description:

    Edenton is a waste of rubble and ash, Vanessa has a secret, and the designers are still at large. Until they’re dead, she’ll never be free. In this exciting sequel to Pipe Dreams, Vanessa lays claim to her legacy and teams with McGrath to take them down, but the betrayal runs deeper than she thinks. Lewis also escaped the island and the Priscilla virus is almost ready for release. As the pieces come together, Vanessa must decide what’s more important — vengeance or family.

    Praise for Pipe Dreams

    “Allison’s voice has been described as poetic or lyrical…

    View original post 92 more words

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  • Friday Feature: My Truck, My Self

    October 4th, 2013

    0924131825-01

    Anyone who knows me, knows me that I don’t like cars.  In fact, sometimes my antipathy towards cars, or I should say any motor vehicle powered by gasoline or electricity and with the potential to lay flat a confused squirrel that can’t figure out which side of the road to run to, is visceral.  The irony is I grew up in the country where the nearest grocery story was two towns over, my high school was two towns over, and most kids when I was growing up got their learner’s permit promptly at 14, their driver’s license at 16.  I got mine at 18.  I put it off as long as I could, until I went to community college and no longer had a school bus to rely on for transportation.

    Motor vehicles have always scared me with their loud, rumbling, noisy engines; their stink of fuel and exhaust; the specter of death lurking in the backseat.  I knew plenty of people (classmates, cousins) who were in either fatal or near fatal accidents.  My mom was in one when I was 14.  She was on her way to work on a cold winter morning and hit an ice patch on the bridge.  They say her car practically flew over the bridge and down and then up a tree.  Seat belts weren’t required by law then so she was found huddled on the floor of the car.  She survived with just a few bruises.  And my dad fell asleep at the wheel once and wound up in the hospital.  I could go on since I have a wealth of relatives alone who have had their own adventures with automobiles.

    When I lived in upstate New York, the only time I liked driving was when I was on a back road at night, a road lightly travelled.  But even then I knew that if a deer suddenly burst from the trees, I would be a goner, or at least the deer and the car.  Or if I hit a rabbit (which I did once), I’d have to stop and get out and move the dead critter to the side of the road so it would have a little dignity before scavengers smelled it.  I knew cars could kill, very easily, and so I’ve never been totally at ease with them.  Where I live now, motor vehicles are a necessary evil.  In fact, we have two because even in this relatively small town, two working people getting around with one car is near impossible.

    So I make the most of it.  In 1997 we traded in my husband’s 1979 Oldsmobile Cutlass (that we can towed all the way from San Francisco) for the 1994 Toyota pickup in the picture above (sans bumper stickers).  It had low mileage and the model is known for lasting for millennium with the proper care.  The Toyota was intended for my husband, but once I got behind the wheel and shifted into 3rd, the first word out of my mouth was “Mine.”  I love standards.  At least with a standard, I feel I have some control over the vehicle, however illusory that may be.

    As you can see, I (we) have a tendency to decorate our vehicles with bumper stickers much the same way we decorate our refrigerator with magnets.  The one of Rick Scott is actually a magnet and I live dangerously by keeping it on my vehicle since I am employed by the state government.  But, hey, Free Speech, right?  The downside of that particular bumper sticker is learning how many people get “Crist” wrong.  Yes, I’ve met a few who really think Crist is just misspelled.  Sigh.

    My favorite sticker is “I don’t have to like Bush to love America.”  Really, I don’t have to like any elected official to love my country, which is a good thing since there are many elected officials that I less than like.  Yes, I did vote my conscience and for Kucinich in the primaries in 2008, but, of course, pragmatism ruled when it came time for the general election.   “Reading is Sexy” was a gift from my husband and so was “California Girl.”  I do “love NY,” although in my mind, NY is upstate NY, not NYC.  My husband is a member of Veterans for Peace as well as an amateur astronomer so, of course, he would prefer to see starlight rather than street lights.  The “final frontier” bumper sticker has something to do with the environment, but it’s so faded now.  I’ve left it there for the irony.

    Finally, cats rule.

    0924131825-01_2

    So do you have a vehicle that you either love or hate?  Do you identify with it?  Does everyone know your vehicle like all my coworkers and friends know my truck? Is your vehicle pristine, or held together with a kaleidoscope of bumper stickers?

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  • Book Bloopers… A Guest Post By S.K. Nicholls

    October 3rd, 2013

    Bloopers! Who can resist :) Check out S.K. Nicholls’ guest post on book bloopers on The Literary Syndicate!

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  • Breast Cancer Awareness Month

    October 3rd, 2013

    Important breast cancer awareness resources from Cate Russell-Cole.

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  • Five Reasons Everyone Should Know Sir Edward Bulwer-Lytton

    October 2nd, 2013

    Spoiler alert! It wasn’t Snoopy after all :) Read on to know the truth.

    InterestingLiterature's avatarInteresting Literature

    By Dr Oliver Tearle (Loughborough University)

    This is the second article in our occasional series, ‘Five Reasons’, in which we take a neglected figure from literary history and endeavour to unearth five interesting or surprising things about them. In our first piece, we took the Victorian novelist and poet George Meredith as our subject.

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  • Papi Talk!… With S.K. Nicholls

    October 2nd, 2013

    Great interview with S.K. Nicholls on The Literary Syndicate!

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