John Howell continues to turn his wry humor to the delights of shopping: in this case, shopping at Whole Foods. Each of the ten items just “sprouted” from his imagination, organically, no doubt. In real life, shopping at Whole Foods is a natural, unadulterated pleasure.
The inspiration for this list came during several visits to Whole Foods. None of these circumstances were as a result of personal interaction while shopping there.
Top Ten Things Not to do at Whole Foods
10 If you are at Whole Foods, do not think you are at a discount outlet. If you do, at best your heart rate will hit a never before achieved rate at checkout. At worst, you will have to do the wait of shame while the checker calls the stock person to return everything you were forced to give up at the checkout.
9 If you are at Whole Foods, do not think the salad bar is a taste first then buy spot. If you do, at best store security will remind you loudly that you are not to eat anything prior to checking out. At worst, you might be asked to weigh in for…
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