Top Ten Things Not to Do on New Year’s Eve

Here is the 26th installment of Ten Top Lists of What Not to Do by Marie Ann Bailey of 1WriteWay at http://1writeway.com and John W. Howell of Fiction Favorites at http://johnwhowell.com. These lists are simu-published on our blogs each Monday. We hope you enjoy.

10.  On New Year’s Eve, do not think you need to consume everything in the city. If you do, at best you may gain a few pounds. At worst, you will never ever feel better again.

9.  On New Year’s Eve, do not think everyone is in love with you. If you do, at best you may get a new roommate. At worst, you may wake up next to a stranger who is now your spouse.

8.  On New Year’s Eve, do not think you have to scream “Happy New Year” more than once. If you do, at best you will lose your voice. At worst, someone may in fact put a sock in it.

7.  On New Year’s Eve, do not think you need to invent and issue resolutions for everyone else. If you do, at best you will lose some friends. At worst, your host may resolve to ban you to the patio.

6.  On New Year’s Eve, do not think you have to help others drink more. If you do, at best you may be the last person standing. At worst, you may be named as a co-defendant on a DUI.

5.  On New Year’s Eve, do not think you need to give everyone a kiss. If you do, at best they will all think you are a nerd. At worst, you may pick up a nice case of bubonic plague.

4.  On New Year’s Eve, you do not have to sing “Auld Lang Syne.” If you do, at best, your off-key rendition will be recorded for playback when you are sober. At worst, you’ll not know the words and remove all doubt as to your IQ.

3.  On New Year’s Eve, you do not have to tell everyone exactly what you think of them. If you do, at best, a few will want to take you outside. At worst, several will.

2.  On New Year’s Eve, there is no reason to remove some of your clothes to be more comfortable. If you do, at best, you may not know when to stop. At worst, there could be additional records of your lack of discretion that you will need to pay handsomely to squelch.

1.  On New Year’s Eve, there is no reason to get behind the wheel of a car after you have won the shots per hour contest. If you do you, at best you will end up in jail. At worst, you might just hurt someone.

24 Comments

  1. I remember someone in college doing that. He mysteriously vanished from the party at some point.

    Like

  2. Well, that’s my New Year’s ruined…😉

    Like

  3. Good Morning Marie. I really got a laugh out of number nine. The whole SURPRISE aspect of that one made me chortle. “Excuse me, but do I know you?” Ha Ha. Great list

    Like

  4. This is exactly why we stay home and play Scrabble to old movies on NYE! 🎉

    Like

  5. On New Year’s Eve, remember that this is the era of social media and cell-phone cameras, and that your boss has internet access.

    Like

  6. My fund for handsomely paying off is at an all time low. Best wear lots of layers. Lots.🙂

    Like

  7. Great advice, Marie! I loved number nine… hilarious. We stay home, the roads are a scary place on NYE. Happy New Year!

    Like

    • Indeed. I just told my husband that he does not want to meet me for dinner after my yoga class tomorrow😉

      Like

  8. God help those of us who found themselves putting check marks…Happy new eear!!🙂

    Like

  9. Ha haaa – best top ten list of the year! Brilliant!😀

    Like

  10. Haha! I love the Auld Lang Syne one! The fear of having things recorded and played back whilst sober = the preventer of a great many bad ideas!

    Like

How to Be a Stoic

an evolving guide to practical Stoicism for the 21st century

Lady Of The Cakes

Vignettes from a multi-lingual, multi-cake-eating freelance existence

eyeonberlin

from the pretty to the gritty

Harvesting Hecate

Thoughts on life, writing, creativity and magic

Indie-Scribable

Affordable editorial services for indie writers

The Journey of Me

Hello! My name is Bella, and this is my journey through cancer and life.

William Pearse | pinklightsabre

Writing is learning to see in the dark

Harm & Evidence Research Collaborative (HERC)

The home of criminology research at The Open University

writingcustoms.com

Writing Perspectives, Practices, and Proclivities

Books: Publishing, Reading, Writing

And, for good measure, a bit of Cooking and Eating

Container Chronicles

my favorite things in one favorite spot

S.K. Nicholls

mybrandofgenius

Jackie Mallon

Author/Fashion Designer

El Space--The Blog of L. Marie

Thoughts about writing and life

JeriWB Word Bank

Writing & Editing Services. Make every word count.

Britt Skrabanek

content optimist & life enthusiast

Hollis Hildebrand-Mills

Divine Imagery Is Everywhere™

Dawn of Thoughts

A brief translation of electrical impulses inside my brain

Kate Shrewsday

A thousand thousand stories

Year 'Round Thanksgiving Project

Not just a one day event, I'm blogging every day about what I'm thankful for

%d bloggers like this: